Are You On a Quest for Positivity?

I follow a YouTuber called Justin Scarred. Justin is from California and is primarily a Disneyland Vlogger (well that’s how I found him) but he also does random vlog around his life, the area he lives in and also Knotts Berry Farm, which is local to him. He’s recently travelled the whole length of Route 66 and back, which was very very interesting to watch, and I’d recommend watching it if that’s the kind of thing you like.

Anyhow, the other day Justin vlogged an update on his Quest for Positivity (or Q4P) and it was a really inspiring video. A few years back Justin went through some big life changes and somewhere along the line he made a conscious decision not to be a victim of the unhappiness he was feeling. He felt he was spiralling into a bitter cycle of feeling sorry for himself, which was projecting into the world around him, and he was tired of it.

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Listening to him talk about this Q4P and how he was getting on with it, range true with me. I’d like to think I’m a fairly positive person, but I can feel really negative too, and when I do it definitely spirals. Many years ago, I considered the practice of counting my blessings on a daily basis, and that’s where my Q4P began.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not all the way there yet, and I have MANY off days. But I know I’m trying. I’m certain that perspective comes with age. I’m about to hit 34 years old, and though no drama has really affected my life, I’m sure the things I’ve dealt with, seen and helped other people deal with, have given me the unique perspective I have on life. And by unique I don’t mean that I’ve got life all sussed in my mind and you haven’t – I just mean my perspective is different from everyone else’s – as is yours.

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I often see people being victims of their circumstances – they’re so deep into the emotions they’re feeling about something that’s happened to them that they get stuck in a rut. Even if they feel like they’ve dealt with the drama they’ve experienced, they’re now in that negative mindset and so that’s now how they deal with every situation that comes to them. Even positive circumstances will be tarred with a negative or dismissive brush.

I’ve come to realise that in my life, I need to accept negativity, then step back from it, brush it off and look at the bigger picture. I have to reset my mind to the middle ground – nice and calm, neither good nor bad – and then take the next thing I have to deal with as a brand new situation.

I’ve gotta admit, this isn’t easy. It takes a lot of practice and I’m not there yet. But once you accept a crummy situation as just that, it’s easier to deal with. No point in fighting it – just use the same amount of energy as you would feeling bitter, and put it into finding a solution.

Justin was right when he pointed out that if you keep hold of that negativity or anger, you’ll spit it out into the world, and eventually you’ll be one of those bitter and twisted old people you saw when you were a kid, but never wanted to be. That’s no way to live!

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So, you want to begin your own Quest for Positivity? A simple place to start by consciously counting your blessings every day. It can be as simple as;

  • Someone asked me how my day was
  • I heard a great joke today
  • That was a lovely cup of tea
  • I have a roof over my head
  • I’m feeling better in my self, than I was last week

There are so many things we can be grateful for, each and every day. And counting your blessings is a fantastic place to start.

We can gain perspective for ourselves, by considering the perspective of others’ in a non-judgemental way. Why did that person act this way? If I was in that person’s shoes, what would have been the catalyst for that behaviour?

As part of considering others, I’ve found it naturally leads to a change in my behaviour, because I won’t do things that might cause anger or hurt to others. I have more insight into how my actions might affect the emotions of others, and in turn I become a better person for it.

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I’m a crazy emotional person, and I find it very easy to jump to anger in many situations, but my quest for positivity has definitely helped me to gain perspective and stay calm in situations where I might not have in the past.

I’d be really interested to hear about your Q4P, if you’re on one. You might not call it that, but if anything you’ve read today rings a bell to you, I’d love to hear what practices you take to better yourself and help you along to a happier and more positive life.

8 thoughts on “Are You On a Quest for Positivity?

  1. A few months ago I got myself into the habit of writing something down that made me happy or I was thankful for every single day, but somehow life got in the way and I got lazy. Reading this post is the push I needed to start up that habit again! I guess you could call that my own personal Q4P. 🙂

    xoxo
    Freya
    tgifreya.wordpress.com

  2. I love this!! Every day last year and for most of this year I have written my daily gratitudes in my journal but I’ve fallen out of the habit of this lately. Lovely post! Exactly the reminder I need to get back to it!

  3. This is such a lovely post! I never thought of it that way. My boyfriend always tells me I need to be more positive so maybe I’ll start by counting my blessings! Looks like a good place to start. Don’t get me wrong, I try and do my best to always smile and be positive. But sometimes it just gets too much and I need a little breakdown. I think it’s healthy to be sad from time to time. Even my mum tells me that if I don’t feel like smiling I shouldn’t do that. But I always feel grateful for what I’ve got. Thanks!

    Julia xx
    theglassofclass.com

    1. Oh absolutely. There’s no point forcing yourself to feel a certain way if you just don’t. But you can count your blessings about sad things too – never regret and learn from things. That’s a blessing too. It’s about feeling positive about your circumstances whatever they might be. Thanks for your comment 🙂

  4. I’m one of those people who hate the positivity mindset as it’s usually presented by the positivity gurus because it feels fake so it was interesting to see that you do the same as me when you said “I’ve come to realise that in my life, I need to accept negativity, then step back from it, brush it off and look at the bigger picture. I have to reset my mind to the middle ground – nice and calm, neither good nor bad – and then take the next thing I have to deal with as a brand new situation.”
    I’m not saintly enough to rejoice in suffering, and I’m really bad at the whole gratitude thing (yes, I have a roof over my head, but my mother has cancer so I always feel like good and bad coexist and I never really get to the mentality of valuing the positives in any particular way, if that makes sense.) I’ve made the conscious decision years ago of playing my best game with whatever hand God gave me. It was that or despair so I’m not really much of a hero…

    1. Thanks for your comment. It was really good to see your perspective. I understand it’s hard to see the positive side when going through hard times, especially when it affects your family. I went through the same with my Father. But it’s little steps and taking the wins when you can, that help you along in the grand scheme of things. And it’s much easier in hindsight. Xx

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